When ginseng tea isn’t enough, figuring out my bandwidth.

Bandwidth sounds like a technical term, something to measure internet speed, but lately I’ve been using it to talk about my mental space. Not long ago, I started feeling this low, nagging anxiety, a weird distress that just wouldn’t quit. I blamed it on a temporary mood and went for a run to clear my head. The next day, the feeling was back, kind of like that annoying popup ad you can’t close. While updating my Now page, I realized I was juggling far more than I ever admitted, especially projects that needed my full attention.

A “Now” page is my quick snapshot of what I’m focused on at the moment, a sort of last page of my journal. Inspired by Derek Sivers, it’s a way of sharing what’s driving my attention and energy right now. I try to keep it fresh, updating it as my focus shifts, even if it means sometimes admitting I overdid it.

A few years back, I dove headfirst into a bunch of projects. I started volunteering, advising startups, and chasing new business ideas, some that worked and others that, well, ended up being my own little disasters I’m too embarrassed to share. I love diving deep into something, getting lost in the details, and burning the midnight oil until my brain begs for mercy. It feels like an endurance race sometimes, with no official finish line, just me chasing that moment when everything finally clicks.

I reviewed my goals and initiatives and found that some were simply left behind. That neglect stirred up more stress, so I decided to slow down on a few fronts, pausing projects like learning Korean or switching from cycling (yes, cycling, my beloved sport) to running. These two activities require quite a lot of time. Cycling, for example, isn’t just a quick loop for me. I end up on half-day rides where my legs and schedule both pay the price, but I love the endurance high I get. That feeling of pushing a bit further when my body insists it’s done can be addictive. Even better when it’s a full day of riding, I feel like I’m on a day trip.

The issue with pausing or reducing some projects is that they’re sometimes social events, and the downside of that is meeting less with those friends. To be honest, switching from cycling to running wasn’t my best idea. I miss the group rides, the banter, and the coffee stops that are half the reason we even ride. It’s a bittersweet trade-off, but for now, it’s helping me keep my stress in check.

Talking about them, one of my cyclist friends said some people seem to have endless bandwidth, and it got me wondering: do they learn how to manage their energy, or were they just born with extra batteries?

“Nothing in life is as important as you think it is while you are thinking about it,”

Daniel Kahneman

Simple research tells us that our brains aren’t built to do everything at once. Every time we switch tasks, we lose a bit of focus. Experts like Daniel Kahneman (The guy from Thinking, Fast and Slow) remind us that our attention is limited and needs careful management. In other words, having more bandwidth isn’t about some secret magic power, it’s about making choices that protect what little mental space we have, something I’m still suck.

So, I’ve tried a few tricks to keep my energy in check. I schedule downtime, set clear boundaries, gave meditation a shot and even switch coffee for ginseng (Ginseng helps rats handle stress, so I figured it might help me handle the rat race.)

Well, none of these turned me into an ultra marathoner (thank goodness), but they did help me realize that trying to do too much just leaves me running on empty. One time, I promised a nonprofit I’d build their website in the same weekend I was juggling another project. By Sunday, I was microwaving my tea for the third time and realized I hadn’t eaten a real meal in 24 hours. That was my wake-up call.

“Dieguito, I’ve done that before, you are a 3x burnout survivor, pay attention.”

Me

Life shifts, and so does my capacity to handle it. Maybe bandwidth isn’t something we master once and for all, but something we renegotiate as we grow. Right now, I’m just glad I’m recognizing those signs of overload before they knock me out. If my future self is reading this, I hope you’ve learned a few more tricks. If not, at least you can smile at how far we’ve come.

Will I ever fully figure out my bandwidth? Probably not. Knowing me, I’ll keep piling on random projects and then wonder why my schedule looks like an abstract painting. But at least now, I can laugh at the irony while sipping a cup of ginseng tea and secretly planning my next half-baked scheme.


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